


Luan's Coping Mechanism

by disenfranchisedvoice



Category: The Loud House (Cartoon)
Genre: Gen, Light Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-13
Updated: 2018-04-13
Packaged: 2019-04-22 03:53:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,908
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14300199
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/disenfranchisedvoice/pseuds/disenfranchisedvoice
Summary: Luan is the light of the party, bringing the laughs and entertainment wherever she goes, but, sometimes it's hard.





	Luan's Coping Mechanism

Luan Loud closes her locker door with a sigh. A new picture of herself as a beaver has found its way to the door again. She rips it off, throws her backpack on her shoulders and makes her way down the school hall. The clamor of students on a Friday after school is nearly deafening to her ears, but it doesn't stop the occasional insult from makings its way to her. Brace face, tin man, overbite, woodchuck, all things she's heard before, but the sting still feels fresh. Freshman year is tough for many children, but Luan has learned to cope in many ways. Her love for comedy is the obvious approach, but that can only go so far, in fact, it has made her more enemies than not in the past few weeks. It didn't help that her pranks would often go backfire, like the time she tried to get on her classmates' good side by setting up a trap for the hated history teach, Mr. Demire. She set up an elaborate trap that started with a chalkboard eraser to the head and ended with a bucket of expired mayonnaise caught on his foot, but instead of the sweet revenge for the constant stream of ridicule, all that resulted was an immense amount of extra homework, pop quizzes and a week's worth of detention for herself and a few other students that he had his eye out for. This really helped in ostracizing her even more, earning more hateful gazes and increasing the amount of time she hid in the bathroom during lunch

Luan ducks into the bathroom to collect herself before confronting her sisters with her after school plans. She takes a deep breath, splashes some water on herself, and pastes a smile on her visage before giving herself the double gun snap to signify everything was okay. As she grabs some paper towels from the dispenser a few other students enter the facilities. The voices following them causes Luan to shudder. Her shoulders instinctively shrink, hoping to hide her presence. The girls pass by and Luan starts to make a dash for the door when a voice stops her dead in her tracks.

“Hey camel face! What are you doing in here? Don't you have garbage pile to sift through? Wait, you call them jokes don't you?” A girl yells out.

Luan shrinks even further into herself hoping her silence will turn her invisible.

“Hey! I'm, like, talking to you, dumb cunt!”

Luan turns slowly to face her aggressor, “Hey Chrissy, I was in a hurry, must not have noticed you,” she manages to squeak out.

“I told you the next time I catch you I'd make you pay. And without any of your sisters here, you're going to pay, like, extra hard, bitch.”

Luan shivers in place knowing exactly where this is going. The next few minutes were likely to be hell on earth for the young teen. There was no telling to what extent the young hormone-addled teen was willing to go to take out her collected stress and frustration on her target, but Luan wasn't willing to find out. She forces her feet to move, turning to make a mad dash for the only exit when the vengeful girl grabs a clump of her ponytail.

“Ow, let me go!”

“Not until you pay for making me miss the biggest sale of the year you slut!”

As she struggles against her captor, Luan's heart starts to burst out of her chest, the combination of pain from her hair being pulled out and fear of what Chrissy was going to do to her, was giving her a mini panic attack.

She forces her legs to move and makes a mad dash towards the door. Her motion halts as Chrissy grabs hold of her ponytail. Luan ignores the pain of the strains of hair being forced out of her scalp and struggles against her captor. With a gust of will Luan breaks free and face faults into towel dispenser. Chrissy falls on her back clutching a hand full of Luan's hair. 

Luan throws her body away from the wall and rushes out of the bathroom. After a short sprint, she ducks thru a few different halls and classrooms before finally falling against the wall allowing her body to slide to the floor. A few choked sobs escape her mouth as Luan covers her face. As moments pass, Luan pulls herself together, rubbing her eyes, and cleaning the snot from her face. She thrusts herself from the ground and gives herself a few light smacks to the face.

“Come on Loud, can't let this get you down, Just got to make it home, then you can be surrounded by the ones who can appreciate you,” she thinks to herself. 

She brushes herself off, trying to make herself presentable for her siblings when she notices her hands covered in blood. She touches her nose and feels the hot blood trickling out. “Dangit, If any of my sisters see this, they won't shut up about it,” she thinks as she pinches the bridge of her nose and throws her head back. This motion brings the pain in the back of her head back to her attention. Her free hand brushes through what remains of her ponytail and notices a significant lack of hair that she had in the morning.

“I know I take after dad, but this is ridiculous, get it,” she says to no one in particular. “Uhh, can't even make an audience of one laugh.” She removes her scrunchie and inspects the source of pain, a small bald patch in the back of her head being evident. “Guess I'll have to cover this up, not like it would be the first time.”

With a new resolve, Luan bolts to the nearest water fountain, not wanting to get cornered again, and strains to look at her reflection in the dull metal. Red nose, red eyes, and streaks of tears on her cheeks. “Maybe I should get Chrissy to be my new makeup artist, but it might end up more painful than I can bargain for,” Luan says with a groan. She uses the small stream to wash as best she can before the final interview with her sisters, then a good night of relaxation.

As she makes her way to the entrance Luan spots her sister and roommate leaning against the wall as a mass of students make their exodus. “Hey sis, ready done workin' for the weekend?”

“You know it, Luna, I can't wait for my act tomorrow at the Chuckle Hut.”

“Can't wait for it sis, it'll be nice to laugh after tonight's gig, wait, you alright Luan,” Luna asks with a was of concern on her face.

Luan knows what she's getting at, but can't let her facade be ruined. “Nothing's wrong Luna, just getting ready for the holiday season. Rudolph doesn't just appear out of thin air now does he?”

“I guess, but were you crying?”

“Drama class got a little out of hand.”

“Alright, but if anything's happening at school, you know you can talk to me about it, right?”  
“You'll be the first to know,” Luan throws in with a chipper attitude.

The sister let the awkward atmosphere hang in the air for a short while before making their way to the parking lot and finding their infamous ride, Vanzilla. Lori and Leni were already sitting in the vehicle ready to get home for the busy weekend.

As Luna opened the back door and head inside, Luan gasps and looks back to the school, “Oh poop, sorry guys, I completely forgot. I have to meet up with the drama club for a few exercises.”

Lori looks up from her phone long enough to utter, “I'm literally not waiting.”

“It's okay, I can walk home, sorry about this guys,” Luan says as she starts to close the door.

Luna stops the motion of the door and sticks her head out, “You sure you can't make it to the show tonight? There's gonna be a sweet after party, just the thing to help mellow you out.”

“Sorry Luna, I really want to make sure my material's ready for tomorrow.”

After a pregnant pause, Luna gives her sister a small hug, “Alright dude. I'm sure it's gonna be killer. Be sure to call if it gets too late, alright?”

“Sure thing Luna,” Luan replies while returning the sisterly affection. “Good luck tonight, I'll see you guys later.” With that Luan heads back to the school, dodging the various students and vehicles in the parking lot.

“Have fun at your Drama thingy Luan,” Leni yells out the window.

“You're supposed to say break a leg Leni,” Luan yells back.

“I don't want you to break anything though. Guys, is Luan getting into a fight?”

“Nah dude, it's just an expression.” She responds, and under her breath, “At least I hope so.”

Lori puts her phone down, starts the van and begins the journey to pick up the rest of her sisters and lone brother, as she pulls into the street Luna breaks the small silence, “Did Luan seem to be acting strange to you guys?”

“What are you talking about Luna,” Lori responds.

“It just... I don't know, looked like she had been crying or something when we met up, and she hasn't used any puns all day.”

“Maybe she literally laughed herself to tears or something, you know Luan would tell us if something was wrong right. Plus you know how Luan gets before a show, it's nothing new.”

“Yeah, I guess you're right sis. Sorry, must be overthinking things, nervous about the gig you know.”

“Are you going to break anyone's legs, Luna,” Leni asks with trepidation.

“I wouldn't bet on it, but we'll see how the night turns out,” Luna responds as she throws on her headphones and starts her favorite Mick Swagger song on repeat. 'Break a leg Luan,' she thinks before her mind slips into the dulcet tones of her favorite band.

Meanwhile, Luan was putting her plan for the perfect pre-show night into action. Standing at the school entrance, she watches as Vanzilla peels out of the parking lot. After a few minutes, Luan is sure that they won't be heading back to the school to pick up any forgotten items, and she heads out. 

 

A few hours later Luan wanders into the Loud house. Backpack full of books and her secret project for the night to come. She looks to and fro for any of her siblings, a small bead of nervous sweat starting to form at her temples. She's done this before, many times, but it still makes her nervous. No one in the living room or den, the coast is clear. Luan makes her way to the stairs, creeping up one step at a time. The sweat starts to flow more freely, forming at more places along her body the higher she goes. A noise erupts from the kitchen, the sound of metal hitting the floor. The disturbance causes Luan to throw caution to the wind as she bolts the rest of the way up the stairs making a beeline to her room. She slams the door closed, but at the last second lets it finish its cycle with a soft click.

“Talk about, uhm... something, something... close encounters... Dangit, my pun game is on the fritz,” she exclaims to herself, wiping the sweat from her forehead. She shakes her head, and gives herself a few small smacks to try and restart her brain, but with no success. She looks around the room, her props and Luna's music paraphernalia litter the floor, but the presence of her roommate is sorely lacking.

'Must have already left,' she thinks, 'But, I better not take any chances, especially if there are people still in the house.' With that thought, she heads to the shared closet and pulls out her prized possession, Mr. Coconuts. She removes her backpack and takes a brown paper bag out, quickly stuffing it inside the dummy. “Hey, this area is for the unloading of passengers only toots,” she speaks in her dummy's voice.

“Sorry Mr. Coconuts, but we've been through this. It'll just be for a few hours, then we can have a lot of fun.”

“That's what you always say, but I'm sure it'll just end up like last time, and the time before that, and the time before that, heck, like every time you shove that thing inside me,” the dummy went on.

Luan was stunned at what came out of her mouth in the dummy's voice. It was true. She used it as an escape, to just get away from the horrible waking world for a few hours, but it always ended the same way. Her laying on her bean bag chair, watching the same video and crying herself to sleep. She wanted it to be different, but every avenue led to the same destination.

“Well, it'll be different this time,” she lied to herself, “I'll just get some work done, get rid of all this stress, and be ready for tomorrow. Easy as pie!”

“Whatever you say toots, whatever you say.”

With that she placed the dummy back into the closet grabs a notebook and pen from the desk and sat in her workstation, The beanbag chair was as comfortable as ever, she takes the remote from the floor and with an exasperated sigh, hits the play button.   
Luan watches the footage from the past few days, trying to get some new material for the big show the next day. Scenes of her family in precarious situations play out on the screen. Lynn holding a football to the ground as Lincoln charges forward, Lynn waits for the boy and pulls the football out of reach as Lincoln reaches his target and gives a full power kick that hits nothing but air. The young boy fly's through the air doing a complete flip before plummeting to the ground. The sound of Lynn's and her laughter erupt from the speakers as the boy groans, lifting his head off the ground, rubbing it with his hand, grimacing to the pain. 

After a moment of contemplation, Luan writes some notes in her book before crossing them out. “It's funny, but it's been done before. Now if Lucy were doing it, that would have been hysterical,” she says to herself.

As the laughter dies off on the TV, the camera focuses in on Lincoln, a small tear falls from his eye as he gets up and limps back to the house. Luan fast forwards to the next scene as a small pile of guilt starts to form in her stomach. 

The next scene shows Leni, the second eldest, walking out of her room, eyes closed, arms up. She heads to the stairs as a small object falls from the ceiling stopping at face level. As she makes contact, she opens her eyes spotting a small plastic spider and belts out a deafening scream which causes Luan to quickly turn down the volume. While she's battling with the plastic demon the camera turns to the end of the hallway as Lincoln runs to the source of the disturbance. He tries to calm down his elder sibling by rubbing her back and telling her that the assailant isn't real, but Leni can't hear him in her terror-filled demeanor. She's flailing her arms about, trying to kill the fake oppressor when an errant strike hits Lincoln on the shoulder. The hit causes him to lose balance. He waves his arms about to try and reclaim his footing, but all in vain as he plummets down the stairs. His screams of pain and fear draw more attention as the rest the siblings crowd out in the hall. A few of the younger girls join Luan in her laughing fit, while Lori and Luna rush down the stairs to check on their brother. The girls huddle around Lincoln, but he gives them assurance that he's fine. The two help him up, but as he begins to walk a grimace of pain erupts on his face. Luna picks up her little brother and takes him into the living room while Lori looks up the stairs spotting Leni and the toy spider. Her brain connects the dots as her face turns red with rage looking up at the camera. 

“What the hell is wrong with you Luan? You could have literally killed him you bi-,” Lori's tirade was cut short as Luan fast forwards again. She makes a few more notes in her book as she watches the scenes whiz by on the screen. The various pranks she's played on the family have all been golden hits, but it seems they all lead to the same result. Lincoln getting hurt in some way. The guilt piles up more and more while she continues to watch.

The screen goes black as Luan turns off the TV. She looks towards the closet, her breathing becoming faster and heavier. 'No, not yet. If I get caught, then it's all over. Just a few more hours and everything will be okay. Come on Luan, get it together, you can't make comedy gold without a few sacrifices... right?'

Luan stands from her chair and heads to the lower bunk bed. She plops down face first and writhes around until the sheets over at least part of her body. She lies in bed trying to will herself to sleep, but her brain has other ideas. Thoughts of the past few months keep replaying in her mind. The failed pranks at school, the loss of what friends she had, Benny turning her down, the awkward drama rehearsals, Chrissy.

'Everything's falling apart it seems. Though I guess I deserve it. Poor Lincoln,' Luan thinks to herself while she subconsciously reaches for the new bald spot on the back of her head. She forces the forming tears back into her eyes and seals them shut, hoping sleep will claim her soon.

-

The noises in the loud house quiet down, it was the start of the weekend, so the normal curfew was given a little leeway, but some sisters pushed the limit to the max leading to an angry Lynn Sr. yelling his children to bed. At least the ones that were home at the moment.

Luan wakes to the pattering of feet in the hallway, looking at the alarm clock on the desk she noted the time, midnight. She lays her head back down, hoping to be surrounded by the sweet embrace of sleep once again before she jolts up and double takes, making sure she wasn't imagining the red numbers on the clock.

“Geez, I almost slept through the main event,” she says groggily, “Can't let that happen. Just a little more time and we can get started... dang I feel like the was a great pun-ertunity there, but I missed it again. I need to get my magic back.” With that, she pulls out a deck of playing cards and tries one of the advanced shuffling techniques she learned to invoke wonder in the kids for her party business, but the cards end up sprawled out in front of her bed. “Dangit.” After looking around she notices she's alone. “Just as planned, Luna's still at that after party, time to start the show.”

After thirty minutes of waiting, Luan sneaks out of bed and slips on her bunny slippers. After a few steps she kicks them off since the squeaky noise they make will only alert the rest of the house to her presence. As she slinks out the door and softly closes it she hears a clinking noise come from the bathroom. Luan throws herself against the wall and reaches for her door handle as her heart races. Before rushing back into her room, she peeks around the hall and notices the light coming from under the bathroom door. 'At this hour it has to be Lynn. Who knows how long she'll be in there... or how long she's been in there,' with that thought Luan plugs her nose and continues her journey down the stairs.

She slows to a crawl when passing her parents bedroom hearing the subtle sound of snores passing through the door. When she makes it to the kitchen she rushes to the refrigerator and takes a carton of juice and scampers back to her room. As she reaches for the handle another quiet noise bellows out of the bathroom. A different noise this time, a noise Luan is intimately familiar with. A quiet sob followed by multiple little sniffles.

She enters her shared room puts the carton down on her desk and exits the room again. She stands in front of the bathroom door places her in front of it and hesitates. She moves her hand to her opposite shoulder and looks back to her room. An internal struggle playing out. She sighs and starts back to her room when a pained sigh enters her ears, a familiar sigh that belongs to her little brother. She knocks on the door before giving a gentle push that allows her entrance. The sight before her breaks her heart, Lincoln sitting on the toilet huddled in a little ball of orange, blue, and white shaking with sorrow.

After an uncomfortable pause she speaks up, “Hey Linc, you okay?”

The eleven-year-old jumps in place before furiously rubbing his face and nose, trying to hide his shame. “Sorry Luan, did I wake you? I'll be done in a minute,' he says while trying to hold his sobs in check. 

Luan stands in the entrance, giving herself a small hug, just watching her brother clean himself up. In the silence, she studies her brother; small scratches and bruises all over his body, a split lip, and a few welts on his head, and a black eye starting to form. 'Jesus, what happened to him? Did he get into a fight with a couple of pit bulls? No, I know what this is, all too well.' With a sigh, Luan closes the door behind her and takes a seat on the sink counter looking over her brother with deep concern in her eyes.

“Um, a little privacy please,” Lincoln says, trying to put some force in his voice.

“Who did this to you Lincoln,” Luan asks.

“What? No, no one did this to me... I just fell and hit a few trash cans and-”

“Cut the crap Linc,” Luan interrupts with a scowl on her face that quickly morphs to a look of concern. “You wouldn't be here at almost one in the morning, still in your clothes, crying if you just fell. I know someone did this to you, so just tell me what happened.”

Lincoln shrinks a bit further into himself at the outburst from his comically inclined sister. He looks from her to the door, weighing his options. He gives a little sigh and relents to his sisters' concern. “Do you remember those guys from Halloween?” Luan nods and Lincoln continues, “Well, apparently they go to my school. They've been held back and recognized me from what happened back then. They started just making fun of me and you guys, but I ignored them. You know, like I was taught, but after a couple of weeks they started getting worse,” Lincoln finishes with more sobs and starts to lose control of himself.

Luan moves closer to her brother and places her hand on his back, rubbing small circles to try and calm the boy down a bit. “What did they do Lincoln?”

After a moment to collect himself, Lincoln continues, “It was small at first, just a few pushes and trips, but I've had worse from Ronnie Anne, so it didn't bother me. Today was different for some reason. I think they might have heard about those full-sized candy bars, or maybe they just got tired of my face, but they just beat me up and threw me in the trash after school today.”

“Wait, why aren't you taken care of, didn't anyone in the house treat those injuries?”

Lincoln looks down at his seat, the shame washing over his face, “I didn't tell anyone. Lori was already gone by the time I got all the trash of me, and when I got home I just hid in my room all day.”

“Why didn't you tell anyone?”

Lincoln just shrugs his shoulders and keeps his eyes on the floor.

“Linc, you have to tell someone. What if they seriously hurt you? I don't want to live the rest of my life without a brother.”

“So I tell you guys and what? I just have my sisters fight my battles for me? I can deal with these guys Luan. I can come up with a plan or something. I did it before and I can do it again,” he almost yells the last statement but stops himself to avoid waking up the rest of the house.

Luan is taken aback by the outburst, but doubles her resolve, “Look, I know it's hard, but-”

“What do you know about it Luan, You guys have it great. Lots of friends and interests. Jobs you can make money with, even Luna's out playing a concert right now. You guys just wouldn't understand what it's like being... being like me,” he whispers out.

Luan is startled by the comparison. She removes her hand from Lincoln and brings it back to hold herself. “It's not like that at all Linc, we all have problems that we can't handle by ourselves.” Luan pauses trying to bring herself to say the lie that might help her brother. “I get bullied too sometimes... but... I talk to Luna about it and she helps me out. I mean, it's not always the best advice, and sure it doesn't stop the bully's from showing up, but it helps to at least have someone to talk to. And besides, Lynn could totally take those guys with both arms tied behind her back.”

Lincoln looks up to his sister, concern planted on his face, “I didn't know that Luan. I'm sorry you have to go through that.”

Just like him, always putting others before himself, the adorable little guy. “It's okay Lincoln like I said... Luna helps me a lot, and I help her when she has problems, but this isn't about me right now. Just promise me you'll talk to someone. If this happens again I'm going to have to talk to Mom and Dad.”

“Okay. I'll try to tomorrow.”

“Don't try, do.” With that Luan swoops down to give her brother a gentle hug.

“Thanks Luan. You're the best.”

The small statement fills her heart with warmth as she hugs her brother a little tighter. “It's okay Lincoln,” she says as she releases her grip and looks him in the eyes. “Now I think it's time we make like lumberjacks and saw some logs.”

Lincoln releases a small giggle and hugs his sister once again. “Good night Luan, and thanks for the talk. You know I'm here for you too, right?”

“Right, now let's go to bed,” at that the two leave the bathroom and Luan opens the door to her room. She looks down the hall to see her brother give her a small wave and a big smile. She returns the gesture and closes the door behind her. After a short moment of contemplation Luan presses her back to the door and slides down to the floor giving a few sobs of her own.

“Sorry Lincoln. I'm not the best. Just the worst, lying sister who can't even take her own advice.” She puts her hands to her face to block the sounds escaping her mouth as she completely breaks down.

-

When Luan finishes her tantrum against herself she looks at the clock shining one thirty in the morning. It's time to start.

She picks herself up and heads to the closet digging out her soul mate. “Looks like you were right Mr. Coconuts. It always ends up this way, huh,” she says giving the dummy a blank stare. She takes the bag out of his back and throws him back into his lair. As she removes the bag she looks at the bottle of cheap vodka that she paid thirty bucks for, removes the lid and downs as much of the contents as she can before the taste causes her to gag. She replaces the lid and dives back into the closet to find her second soul mate. After digging around for a few minutes she emerges with a video and replaces the one in the VCR. She walks to the desk grabs the half-empty carton of juice and dumps the rest of the vodka inside. Taking a swig from the haphazard cocktail she grimaces, but it goes down smoother than the last drink. She sits in her beanbag chair and hits play on her controller.

The screen flashes to life and a few seconds pass as Luan nurses her stress relief, The title settles on the screen as she prepares to redo the night she's done many times before. Lincoln Crying (3 Hours) begins to play and the night goes on like life's biggest comedy act, and what's comedy without the tragedy that creates it.


End file.
